The Morning Comes!

Till the joy comes in the morning, I'll be waiting.

Till my pain's replaced by power, I'll be glad.

I will sing and shout "Hosanna" to the shadows,

And the valley will re-echo with my praise.

As I walk the lonely mountain, I'll be singing,

And no rain, however cold, can freeze my joy.

Though the shadows may be deep, the ground is solid,

And the way is paved by those who've gone before.

Redeemed am I! No sin can overcome me!

The battle is already fought and won.

Nothing high or low, in earth or hell can have me.

Though my tears may last the night, the morning comes!

The Pashmina Shawl

Unless I die I cannot live

Pushing through life like tall grass

Wresting the hands that pull me back

Falling, sometimes staying down

Until lifted by the Commander

I weep into his shoulder

Rasping again that I cannot,

He reiterates, "you can."

Feebly loving my lover

Whose death, ten times the agony

Was given ten times more eagerly

Than my little deaths

Sprouting out of narrow lives

I cannot keep

But cling to still, a fool

Knowing her foolishness

Yet wringing weak drops of joy

From joyless rags

When my lover waits

With a pashmina shawl

Woven in love

Dipped in mhyrr

And I, preoccupied with my rag, reject

The fragrant gift, and struggle on.

But when I weary of my wringing,

My hands, exhausted, bruised and aching

Drop beside me, my eyes raising

To the risen dier with his gift

Woven of words and grace and promise

He wraps it round my shoulders

Warming, reassuring

And lulling me to peace. 

Yearning Soul

As a writer creates a strong protagonist, she must instill in him strong desires. To put it simply, the character must want something. He must be pursuing a desire or a goal. This is what makes him real, dynamic, interesting.
We all want something. We all have goals. Sometimes, our goals are un-Christlike and we must align them with scripture. However, for many of us the thing we most want in the world is perfectly good and scriptural: a husband, children, a godly friend, the salvation of a loved one, opportunities to minister. But for some reason our good desire hasn't been granted and we don't understand why God doesn't let us have this good thing we want.
I have several big wants in my life right now, and they are all, in and of themselves, perfectly good, natural desires. They are also clearly not God's will for me at this time, which is, quite honestly, a little hard to swallow. I wish I could say that I quietly submit to God's will without complaint and wait patiently for his perfect timing.
But I can't say that.
Because it isn't true.
Frankly, I think I have the patience of a 5-year-old. I don't even like to play board games in which I have to wait my turn. Waiting on God's time is hard. It's testing. It's sometimes frustrating. But I am learning, slowly, that I must talk to my yearning soul and remind it of all the truths I know about God. If I take my eyes from the future and focus on the next step, I restore my sense of purpose. What has God given you to do today? Tackle it. When you feel the prickle of discontent, you must say to yourself:

Yearning soul, be patient. If you pursue your own desires instead of God's will, you find it bitter. It will not satisfy.
Yearning soul, be still. Your restlessness is faithlessness. Stop kicking against the pricks and submit.
Yearning soul, be grateful. Tear your vision from the unknown tomorrow and the blessings you want it to hold, and focus on today and the blessings you have already received.
Yearning soul, awake. Don't dream only of the future and the good you might do in it, focus on the good you can do today. See the needs you can reach where God has you stationed, instead of wishing you could meet the needs you cannot reach.
Yearning soul be eager. Anticipate your future, but also eagerly take advantage of the present. There are no terms to your service. Serve wherever you are with everything you can give.
Yearning soul, be learning. Don't bypass the lessons you are meant to learn now. You will need them in your future.

Most importantly, don't pretend that you will be content when you get that one thing you want. Another desire will rise up to take its place. If you are not content today with the life God gives you, then you will not be content tomorrow. If you are in God's will, then where you are today is where you are meant to be and there are thousands of blessings in this place, but you must open your eyes to them. Don't nurture a spirit of discontent in your heart, it will follow you throughout your entire life, and you will never find rest for your yearning soul.